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Size Matters

February 7, 2015

Women, as a general rule, want to be smaller… not shorter you understand, most of us are already short enough!  Many of us claim not to be overweight, but under-tall or perhaps vertically challenged.  For most of us, buying clothes in a smaller size would be cause for delight… maybe even a little celebration with just the tiniest dish of ice cream with chocolate sauce, a dab of whipped cream and a cherry on top.  Double fudge brownie on the side is optional, of course.

Personally, I made it all the way up to five foot two and I still tower over my eight year old granddaughter… my feet are still a fraction of an inch bigger than hers, as well.

Her older sister is another story indeed.  That girl, now twelve and a half, has had bigger feet than me for the past four or five years, and now she’s passed me up in height.

I’ve got her on circumference, though.  I have more curves.  Right now, if that pre-pubescent child stands sideways and sticks out her tongue, she looks like a zipper.

I, on the other hand, do not.

It’s not that I’m fat…  in fact recently, a doctor told me that I am not overweight.

I love that man.  I recommend him to all my friends.

I used to carry around another sixty pounds, but then, when I hit my mid-fifties, I discovered water aerobics… it’s an exercise program that I really enjoy and I’ve made many new friends in the process.  It’s truly a win-win proposition.

I come from a long line of exercise-avoiders, so ten years ago, if you would have told me I’d ever look forward to exercising, I would have called you a liar to your face.

Now I teach class one day each week and if I miss class, I slip into B-drive in the blink of an eye.  There are a few people (mostly men) who can and will agree, but I see no reason for them to speak up now.  I’m trustworthy.

What’s B-drive, you ask?  Well, since you asked, I’ll tell you:  it’s b**ch mode…  and I don’t like it any more than those sweet unnamed men, bless their hearts.

Water aerobics has led to changes in my diet and the extra pounds have disappeared. I even have muscle definition.  My muscles are quite well-defined and I know how to spell their names, too!

My skin is another matter entirely.  It’s holding a grudge and insists on staying a size sixteen.

So now I have a size eight body inside a size sixteen skin suit.  It isn’t all that pretty but I’m healthier in both mind and body;  and I’m stuck with it.

You know what they say;  keep your friends close and your enemies closer.

  1. Margaret permalink

    Karen, you are too funny!

  2. Thank you, Margaret! I’m glad you enjoy my stories.

  3. Why can’t there be “skin drives” like blood drives. I would donate weekly! And I would pay THEM to take it off💰💰💰🔪

  4. You are one forward-thinking woman, Robyn! Thanks for reading!

  5. Greg Frosig permalink

    Another one for your next book!!😃

    Sent from my iPhone


  6. Time will tell! Thanks for reading!

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